4 Years!?

I can't believe Austin and I have been married for four years! Are we still 'newlyweds'?  I think with two kids, probably not!

I remember before Austin and I got engaged, I was very nervous to get married. I was still 19 and it was such a big decision to be making.  We had both been living in Provo going to school and at the end of the semester he drove me home to my parents house.  When he left to go home, I was sooo sad! I did not want to be without him, even for a day.  I think it was good that we had to spend that summer apart because it made me realize how much I wanted to be with him. forever.

Austin seriously did such an awesome/romantic job proposing, it was so perfect.  It was a Thursday night and he was supposed to be coming on Friday.  My sister and I decided to go on a walk at Smith Rock Park http://www.oregonstateparks.org/park_51.php.  It is a beautiful state park about 10 minutes from where I grew up.  Lots of memories going hiking and running there.  I texted Austin and asked him if I could call him later for our nightly phone call.  He replied: "sure." I remember that bugging me for some reason, turns out he did it on purpose.  Definitely made it more of a surprise...

Anyway, my sister said we would take practice engagement pictures just to find some good places, even though we weren't technically engaged.  She even got me to do my hair and  makeup! haha sneaky girl.  So we get to Smith Rocks and we are walking along.  We had her dog with us and we let it off its leash.      I remember turning a corner and seeing a guy playing the guitar, but he was pretty far away.  I said " Oh great, that guy is gonna get mad cause we let the dog off the leash" or something like that.  Court just kinda laughed at me.  I did a double take and remember thinking "Austin has a jacket like that....and he plays the guitar......and he has dark hair like that....." So I looked at Court and said "Is that Austin!?" She just smiled at me.  I was in shock cause I hadn't seen him in four weeks.  So I kinda start crying and I ask it again "IS That Austin!?!" I'm sure my sister thought I was pretty dumb.  But she nodded.

And that is when I took off running down the hill.  He stopped playing the guitar and we had a cheesy run together and hug moment. haha oh it sounds pretty cheesy, but it was freakin romantic. I was seriously crying and shaking by now.  Austin was shaking and so nervous.  He didn't say hi or anything, he just dropped to his knee and asked me to marry him! I nodded my head cause I couldn't even talk! haha oh man, good moment.  So he stuck that ring on my finger and I remember saying something about how it was too big, but who cares!  Have you ever kissed your boyfriend/fiancee after four weeks of no kisses? That was fun, haha. TMI?

Court was already gone by this point because I had always said I wanted to get proposed to in private, but now I wish I had asked her to take pictures, cause we have none :(

So we ate some masssive chocolate strawberries and sparkling cider that Court had prepared for us, what a good sister!  Turns out her and my dad had planned this whole thing with Austin.  I was seriously so surprised, good job Ausy!

So we got married 3 months later in the Boise Temple and I am so glad my little 19 year old self decided to say yes! 

After four years and two kids I can definitely say that I love Austin more than the day I married him! I have seen him as a father and that makes me so much more in love with him.

Why I love Austin:

1.  On Saturdays he watches the kids in the morning so I can sleep in!

2.  He makes me laugh more than any other person I have ever met.

3. He is nice to everyone.

4. He is patient and calm (which I am not!)

5.  He helps me to be less of a stress case.

6.  Eats my not so yummy dinners without complaining, and says thank you :)

7.  Watched and supported me through two childbirths and still loves me haha

8.  Holds the priesthood (if you don't know what that means http://www.lds.org/topics/priesthood?lang=eng)

9.  He surprised me with a new car for my birthday, woot woot!

10. Mows our lawn, thank goodness cause I would never do it!

11. Tells me I'm beautiful. Which is nice to hear after having babies!

12.  Watches the babies so I can go running.

13. He is handsome

14. He is a good kisser (TMI again?)

15. He doesn't judge me for my wacko-ness.

There are so many reasons I could go on and on...but Reece just woke up and Liam smells suspicious.  Time to potty train that kid.  So I will hurry and stick some old pictures on here that I love to look at 

This is our first picture together. We are on the left.  Creepy snow man, I know.  Blame Austin and his friends.

Why did I cut my hair?

This was the weekend we got engaged.

Baby Liam

Baby Reecie 

Happy four years babe! I love you!

Baby Reece's Birth-5 Months Later

For some random reason, I woke up thinking about how I never wrote about Reece's birth!  How did I forget to do that? So now that he is almost 5 months old, I will finally write it all down.  

A week before he was born I wrote about our failed attempt to get induced, http://kenznaust.blogspot.com/2012/03/still-pregnant.html That was super fun! (Sarcasm is obvious right?) Thankfully I kept a journal while I was in labor, so I know what time everything happened. 

So on Monday March 12, I went back to my doctor.  I still wasn't dilated very much.  We decided to try to induce again on Friday the 16th, which was the day after I was due.  The most frustrating part of getting induced is waiting for them to call to get the go ahead to come to the hospital.  They tell you to come at 7 am, but at 6ish we got a call saying it will be more like 10, if at all.  

We ended up getting to the hospital around noon.  They hooked me up to pitocin immediately since they knew that prostaglandin gel doesn't do anything for me.  So I started getting contractions pretty quickly, but they weren't painful.  I actually enjoyed them because I knew they were making my baby come!  So at this point it was a boring waiting game.  They moved us from a small, old room to a bigger room.  So that was nice, except the tv had no dvd player.   I was mostly reading my kindle and Austin was watching basketball (March Madness baby).

At 5pm my doctor came to check if I was progressing. I think at this point I was only dilated to a 3.5 ish.  He broke my water without warning me! haha, talk about weird feeling.  With Liam I was in a lot of pain so I don't really remember anything, like my water breaking.  Obviously having my water broken got things going.   Much more intense contractions.  Going into this experience I was debating whether or not I would get an epidural.  I got one with Liam and it did NOT work.  It made me totally paralyzed but I could feel all the pain.  Not a good experience.  Austin said the anesthesiologist acted offended when it was suggested that he didn't do a good job....sorry buddy, but ya screwed up!

Back to Reece....after my water broke, things we were bearable for several hours.  When I started to get to the point where I couldn't handle the pain I started hesitating about what to do.  I felt like such a wimp to get     an epidural, especially when so many women go natural (blah).  I also kept wondering if it was too early to get one, did I really have such a low pain tolerance?  By the time to anesthesiologist got there I was sooo ready for that epidural! I didn't care if I was a wimp because I couldn't handle it anymore! 

Getting the epidural was creepy feeling, I don't remember it all from Liam.  It is weird how pain makes you so delirious that it blocks out memories.  

The doctor who gave me my epidural was awesome! He was probably 60 or so and had over 30 years of experience.  The nurse was obviously a fan of his.  So the epidural was given at 10 pm and it was heavenly.  So heavenly that I promptly fell asleep!  The only times I woke up was when the nurses wanted me to roll to my other side so that my epidural would spread to both sides of my body ( I had really good nurses!)  

 At about 2:20 am my doctor came to see how things were going.  He had to wake me up, that's how comfortable I was. 

I was expecting to be dilated to a 7 or 8, so I was very surprised that I was at a ten and ready to push.  I was so sleepy that I had to hurry and wake up.  I was not in the right mentality to work hard enough to get a baby out!

So I started pushing at about 2:45 am. thankfully by this point the epidural was wearing off, so I could feel some pressure but not any pain, it was perfect!   But it was taking forever to get him out! And every time  I pushed, his heart rate would drop.  They made me wear an oxygen mask, which was annoying.  Finally at 4 am Reece was close enough that the nurse called the doctor to come deliver the baby.  That's when we found out that Reece was face up, which makes it hard for babies to come.  Thankfully he was able to rotate him, yay for no c section!

After the doctor rotated Reece, things went fast.  I pushed for about 20 more minutes. I remember my doctor telling me it would be my last time pushing, that's how close he was.  Well, when the next contraction came Reece seriously just came out on his own! haha I just had to push a teeny bit to get him all the way out.  Made us laugh.  

When he came out the cord was wrapped around his neck three times! Thankfully no one told me that until later.  But that explained why his heart beat kept dropping every time I pushed.   Once they got the cord off his neck, they just plopped him on my chest.  Best thing ever! He had a thin blanket around him and I remember feeling his warm body and thinking how alive he felt.  Which was maybe a random thought, but he was just so awesome to hold.  He was also facing the wrong way, and for some reason I couldn't make my arms work to flip him around to see his face.  Anyway, the nurse turned him around so I could look at his sweet face. Oh he was so sweet.  He just stared up at me with his little eyes. Loved it.  Meanwhile, Austin cut the cord like a pro, of course.   He also took some super glamorous pictures of my mascara smudged face.  Too many happy tears for makeup.  

After they weighed him and cleaned him up, I held him again and had to check him out.  One of the first things I noticed was his funky baby toes. They seriously comes out of the top of his foot. Still do.  It makes socks annoying to put on.  He also had hairy ears and a lot of brusies on his face and head.  His head was totally purple and it looked like he had lots of hair because of it.   I nursed him for the first time and he did great, thank goodness.   After he got a bath and fed, we obviously should have slept. Maybe we did, I can't remember.  Later that morning Liam got to meet his baby brother.  He was a little weirded out, I think.  He held him for about a minute and said he was "tute" and that his belly button was "owie."   

When Liam was born we were in the hospital for a long time because he was jaundice.  This time I seriously expected to leave within 24 hours, I don't like hospitals!  The next morning we found out that Reece had jaundice, even worse than Liam.  They said it was probably because of all the bruises.   I was so disappointed I just started crying.  I couldn't help it, I wanted to go home!  So that was Sunday morning that they put him under the uv light.  On Monday morning it was still too bad to go home.  Monday night I got released from the hospital.  Me, Liam and Austin got a guest room 4 floors down from the nursery.  That was super annoying.  Monday night I had to make the trek from our room to the nursery every 2 hours so that I could nurse him.  I was obviously really uncomfortable still, so that was a looong walk.  On Tuesday morning they finally let us leave.  Reece had to have a bili-blanket, but I was just excited to go home!  We went and ate Carls jr, it was awesome.

Reece was jaundice for a long time.  He had to get his blood tested several times a week for a couple weeks.  His levels finally lowered enough to get rid of the blanket, but his eyes were still pretty yellow, poor kid.  When he was about a month old he was still pretty yellow, he had to get tested again.  It turns out that he had the type of jaundice caused by breastfeeding.  Thankfully its harmless and we didn't have to do anything about it.  I don't think his yellow eyes were gone until he was almost three months old.  

I wrote way too much, but I have to remember this stuff! Here is the fun part: pictures.

My favorite picture. He was just staring at me and probably wanting to go back in my tummy.

Not fat like we thought, only 7 lb 6 oz.  20 3/4 inches.

Squished ears, poor baby.

Meeting big brother.

 So sweet!

I love this pic that Mariah took (or Julie?).  Candid photos are always my favorite.

So peaceful in his great grandpas hands.  This was the day of his baby blessing.  

This picture is so sweet, I love it. 

Reece is the sweetest baby ever! He has been so fun, especially because he is a great sleeper :)

Weight Loss Progress...

My last blog post was at the end of April and I had decided it was time to lose weight and get back in shape.  Things have been going pretty well, but very hard.  To lose weight you really have to be committed and be in the right mind set.  I have been running a lot! I go pretty much every day, but only 2-3.5 miles.  I still wanna get my mileage up.  I have been toying with the idea of doing a half marathon, but probably not until next summer.  On Saturday I am doing my first 5k in over a year, we will see how that goes! Thankfully my mother and father in law are running it with me, so that should make it more fun.

Losing weight is harder than getting in shape.  Its easier to go out and run than it is to resist those yummy brownies in the kitchen.  I haven't been able to restrict calories too much because I am breastfeeding Reece and I did not want to lose my milk supply.  I don't even count calories, although I do avoid really high calorie foods (like Ranch dressing, which I haven't had in over a month!).  Mostly I try to stop eating when I am full.  I know that sounds dumb, but I have a big over eating problem!  I also don't eat junk food, although that is a big problem on Sundays.  What is it about Sunday that makes you wanna pig out? 

The 'rule' that I have been best about following is not eating after 8 pm.  It is easy to follow this rule because I go running in the evening and can't run with a full stomach.

The goal I made in April was to lose 25 pounds by July 25, which was last Wednesday.  I wanted to lose about 2 pounds a week.  I noticed over the last 3 months that weight loss really fluctuates.  Some weeks I wouldn't lose any weight and some weeks I would lose 5 pounds.  It was really all over the place.  Anyway, I weighed myself on July 25th and I weighed 152 lbs.  My goal is 145 ish, so only 7 lbs left.  Total of 18 pounds lost!   I am a little short of my goal, but who cares? I  feel great and I want the weight loss to be permanent, so I will take my time!

Here is a pic when I am about 8 months preggers (am I allowed to use a pregger pic for a 'before' pic? Oh well. Makes it look like I have lost lots of weight!)

Here is a pic from Reece's baby blessing (Easter Sunday), he was 2 weeks old.

Here is the pic Austin took for me last Sunday! Still some work to do, but feeling good!

Time to Lose Weight!

I have been thinking a lot about what my body used to be capable of doing.  I used to go on 10 mile runs at a 7 and a half minute mile pace. Today I jogged around my neighborhood and thought I was gonna die.  I think a lot of it has to do with carrying around a bunch of extra weight.  Obviously I just had a baby, so I am not being too hard on myself.  But I really miss the feeling of having a strong body that I controlled. Now a days I feel like my body controls me.  I am controlled by my heaviness and I don't like it! So I am going to lose weight not just so I can look better, but so I can feel better and be healthy and strong.

Losing weight while nursing seems to be really hard for me.  Once I stopped nursing Liam I lost weight really fast because I could cut calories and lose weight really fast. Unfortunately, I lost it too fast and gained most of it back before I got pregnant with Reece.  Everything I have read says you shouldn't cut too many calories while nursing.  So my plan is to lose it slowly, only 2 pounds a week.

Here are the rules:
- No ice cream or candy
-No eating after 8 pm
-Lots of water, and water is the only thing I can drink (which is hard because we always have a pitcher of kool aid in our fridge)
-No second servings- so I better get what I want the first time around
-Stop eating when I am full-that's a toughie for me
-Always eat breakfast
-Go on a walk/jog everyday the weather permits
-Limit my snacking

I really don't like to do diets where I restrict the types of food I eat, rather I restrict the portion size.  If I deny myself certain foods (carbs), I just rebel and quite my diet.

Recap of my weight history:  When I got married I weighed 135 pounds and I was super scrawny.  But that weight was pre-baby, so my standards are different (and realistic!).  When I got pregnant with Liam I weighed 142, which I was pretty happy with.  After Liam was born I stayed around 160 until I stopped nursing when he was 8 months old. In only a month I got down to 144.  I felt like crap and was hungry all the time because I only had about a thousand calories a day.  But I was happy with how I looked and could wear all my old clothes. By the time I got pregnant with Reece I was hovering around 155 to 160.  Which I obviously was not happy with.  My clothes were too small!  And I am too poor to buy all new clothes!  Anyway, while pregnant with Reece my highest weight was 184, same as with Liam.  So technically I gained a lot less weight this time because my starting weight was higher.  Unfortunately, I have the same amount of weight to lose.   - now here we go- I weigh 170 pounds! EEK!  I know for a lot of people this is a normal and healthy weight. But lets keep in minds that I am only 5'4".  And I wanna be in shape to run and that is more weight than I wanna carry.  Plus my poochy tummy looks bad in clothes!

So my goal weight is 145 pounds.  I think that it is totally reasonable and attainable.  Some people might think I need to lose more weight than that since I am so short, but oh well.  I don't wanna starve myself just to be at some unrealistic weight!  That is a total of 25 pounds to lose.  If I lose 2 pounds a week, I should reach my goal in 12.5 weeks.  That is the end of July.

I figured if I wrote this and posted it to facebook, I would have a lot more accountability for my weight loss.  No more denial about how out of shape I am in or how much I weigh.

    

GOAL: Lose 25 pounds by July 25th


I will let you know how it goes!

Still Pregnant...

When I went to my doctor appointment on Tuesday he did an ultrasound because he was worried about the size of the baby. The ultrasound gave us an estimated weight of 8 lbs 14 oz., which is pretty chubby! Of course ultrasound weights can be off by a pound in either direction, but my doctor said he was probably between 8.5 and 9 pounds. My doctor decided he wanted to induce on Friday (yesterday) before Reece got too big. I was game for that plan!

We got to the hospital yesterday at 10:30 ish. Since I was only dilated to a 2, he used a prosta-glandin gel to help me dilate. That was at 11:20 am. That made me super duper crampy and gave me a few contractions. I walked around the hospital for a long time, hoping to move things along. I even went up to the recovery floor where the nursery is, such cute babies!

After they give you that gel they wait a long time to put you on pitocin because they don't want to attack you with sudden intense contractions. They want to mimic what a natural labor would be like. At 5:20pm the nurse got me all hooked up to pitocin. I started getting some really good, regular contractions. They started to get pretty uncomfortable and even painful. I was excited cause I thought we were getting ready for a baby to come!

My doctor came to check my progression at about 7:15 pm. I was sure I was dilated to at least a 4. Apparently so was my doctor because he got everything all ready to break my water and get things going! Well it turns out I hadn't changed at all... I was maybe at a 2.5.

That was really disappointing. So he offered to break my water anyway. But since I was hardly dilated at all, it was going to be incredibly painful just to break my water, not to mention how long and intense my labor would be. Once your water is broken, you HAVE to have your baby or else there could be an infection. This means if my body still didn't go into labor, I would have to get a c-section. And even if I did go into labor, it would have lasted all night and would have been much more intense than a natural labor. So the doctor suggested that we go home and check back next week to see if things have progressed on their own.

It was starting to sound like my experience when I had Liam, which was not good! Austin and I both felt that we were trying to force something that just wasn't supposed to happen. And I have been saying throughout my entire pregnancy that I wanted a more natural experience.

So we decided to go home. Honestly, by this point I was so excited to go home and sleep in my own bed. Hospital beds are horrible!

So we left the hospital at about 8:15 pm and headed home.

I was really sad and disappointed at first, but by the time we went to sleep last night I was feeling very peaceful. I knew it just wasn't supposed to happen yesterday and that's ok!

Of course when I woke up I was sad because I could have been cuddling my baby! But I am back to feeling okay with the whole situation.

I am not even due until Thursday, so I just need to be patient.

I am also kinda glad we went home because our nurse was super annoying! From the time we got to the hospital until 7 pm we had the best nurse ever! She had this take charge attitude and was just so nice. But when her shift ended, the dumbest nurse took over. I seriously could have punched her in the face. She was not confident at all, and I could tell she was a real suck up. She had to follow all the rules to exactness. She was really soft spoken so I didn't even know what she was saying half the time. How am I supposed to have confidence in you if you don't have it in yourself? Seriously, I felt like I couldn't trust her to do the competent thing.

Anyway, we only had to deal with her for about an hour. When we were checking out she offered over and over again to get us a cart for all our stuff...uh, we only have one tiny suitcase. I'm pretty sure Austin can handle it. And she tried to force me into a wheelchair! I was completely normal and not in labor, why would I wanna sit in a dumb wheelchair? ugh..and then she followed us all the way to the main entry of the hospital because its 'policy.' Oh man. I know these are dumb things to complain about, but when you are uncomfortable everything gets 100x more irritating!

So maybe it is a good thing we went home so that I wouldn't have to go through a grueling labor with her! Does anyone know if you can call your hospital ahead of time and ask to NOT have a certain nurse? Cause it kinda sets the mood for your entire labor....

I have an appointment with my doctor on Monday at 11, so we will see if anything happens over the weekend. Maybe things will be progressed enough that we can try again next weekend. I am starting to feel like this baby is never gonna come! So cross your fingers that we have good news on Monday!

oh the woes of a pregnant lady....

I am up in the middle of the night, not feeling so great. I can't sleep...

I was thinking about being pregnant earlier today and here is what I have decided:

1. I am super grateful that I can get pregnant so easily. Or at all. I got pregnant less than two weeks after I stopped taking birth control. (TMI?) I read so many blogs written by women who struggle with infertility and how sad it is! I am glad Heavenly Father knew I couldn't handle that type of problem.

2. I have not puked this entire pregnancy. I didn't with Liam either. I feel sick in the beginning, but not too bad.

3. The baby is super healthy and kicks me a lot. Which is a nice reminder that everything is ok in there.

4. I feel pretty normal. I'm just a little tired.

5. The only thing I can 'complain' about: how boring and slow pregnancy is. I just want to meet this baby! I keep imagining if he is going to look like Liam, act like Liam, have blue eyes like Liam, etc.

6. What are we gonna name him? I really don't want to bring a nameless baby home from the hospital.

7. When I am pregnant I become super OCD and maybe a little bit of a hypochondriac. Any other pregnant lady that way? "Something is wrong with my baby cause my ankle hurts..." etc.

8. I'm so grateful that this baby is a boy. Of course I kind of wanted a girl, just because their clothes are so cute. But it will be so good to have our two little boys. I know Liam will get along better with a boy. Plus I can torture them by dressing them as twins.

9. I am really going to miss my sleep. Liam usually sleeps 10 hours a night without making a peep. I guess I should enjoy that for the next 4 months.

10. Are Liam and the baby ever going to nap at the same time? Will I be a crazy tired lady by the time Austin gets home from work?

I think that is all for now. How random this is, but I am tired. I am feeling a little better so I'm gonna try to go sleep. See ya!

Buying a house is not fun...

I have had some people asking me whats going on with the house we are buying. Lets just say it has been a total nightmare.

We made the offer on the house back in July. Its a short sale, so we knew it would be a long process. (Why do they call it a 'short' sale?)

Our offer got approved by the bank the end of August. But the bank we were getting our loan from wouldn't close on the sale until a couple things were fixed with the house. The old owner of the house was on the verge of foreclosure, so obviously he didn't care about fixing those things. We had to put some siding up on a little area of the house because they hadn't finished an addition. Apparently appraisers don't like exposed wood. After that we still couldn't close because we had to patch the holes inside the house. And then we still couldn't close because we had to paint the exposed beams on the addition. Thankfully we didn't really have to spend any money.

So finally we closed the last week of September. It was a Tuesday and we were supposed to get the keys on Friday. Wednesday morning the Realtor called me to tell me there was a problem. The owner had taken out a second mortgage and the bank had never approved the sale. So pretty much the process started all over.

Last week we found out the second mortgage wanted to get $3,000 from the sale. If everything had gone correctly, this would simply have been in our mortgage.

So they went to the old owner and he could only pay about $800 or so. The sellers Realtor is the one who screwed this all up, so she paid $300. (How generous...not)

So they came to us, asking us to pay $1800. Isn't that the dumbest thing ever!!

We suggested they just try adding it to our mortgage, even though it was a little late. The bank agreed that was fine, so we were on again! Woo hoo!

Later that day I find out that wont work because we got our loan from a rural development fund aka the government. And their department had run out of money for the year. But our mortgage lady said she would try anyway.

But then we found out that the RD fund got more money, yay!

So that is where we are right now, waiting to see if the RD fund will add the money on to our loan. Hopefully we will know before the weekend.

Basically everything that could have gone wrong, has.

The one good thing is that we got an interest rate of only 3.75%

But that expires on November 15, so lets hope this gets all straightened out before that day!!

Well, that was a long explanation. But that is why we are still not in our house, even though we started this process 3 months ago. Thankfully Austin's grandparents are nice enough to let us live with them. They have actually been gone more often then they have been here since they travel to stay with all their children.

Anyway, hopefully the process will be over in the next week or so! Wish us luck!